Harder To Breathe
by RachelFan86
Summary: In a game of telling New Year's Resolutions, Ross professes hidden feelings for the girl of his dreams. Will she feel the same?
1. Default Chapter

Harder to Breathe  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters, though I wish I did. ;) I'm just a fan. Nor do I own the lyrics or rights to the song. The song is by Maroon 5 and I'm on a Maroon 5 kick at the moment. You may not think the song goes with the fic, but I do. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
It was just something she never expected. Something she never dreamed of. After the way she had acted over every single one of his girlfriends, never in a million years did Rachel see herself together again with Ross. But than it all changed last New Years Eve. The gang had decided to just have a small gathering of the six of them in Monica and Chandler's apartment. Just like the good old days. Rachel had been feeling things for Ross for the months that led up to that New Years Eve. She held those feelings deep in her heart. Never did she profess she was still in love with the Dino Boy. Every time she saw him her heart skipped a beat. How would she have known her dream would come true last New Years? To spice it up a bit, Monica had suggested the gang all give some resolutions for the New Year. One by one, they went around in a circle. When it came to Ross's turn, he felt his heart begin to beat like the patter of the little drummer boy's drumstick on his drum at the beat of a million miles per second.  
  
"Ross, so what is your resolution?" Monica asked her brother. Yet he didn't answer her right away. He seemed to be off in another world. "ROSS!"  
  
"Oh. Yeah. Right. Well, I have some private ones but I guess my major resolution is to profess my love to this girl and hope she'll go out with me," he said, glancing at Rachel. There she sat, the girl of his dreams, with a puzzled look on her face.  
  
"Dude, who is it?" Joey screeched excitedly.  
  
"It's that dorky girl I saw you a few weeks ago with in Central Perk, isn't it?!" Phoebe said. "The one with the long black curly hair and those glasses that make her look ancient."  
  
Ross just starred dumbfounded at her. "No. It is not her. Are you really that intrigued?"  
  
Chandler got up from the couch and said, "You're flingin, flangin right I am! Who is she? Who is she?"  
  
Even Rachel herself was curious. "Yes Ross. Who is she? Why have you kept this a deep dark secret?"  
  
Ross took a deep breath. He couldn't believe he was about to profess his love. "Well. Well."  
  
"Just spit it out. Just spit it out!" Monica yelled. She almost chucked the glass she had been holding in her hand across the room and everyone ducked.  
  
"It's you Rachel. You're the girl I've had a crush on for the longest time."  
  
How dare you say that my behavior is unacceptable So condescending unnecessarily critical I have the tendency of getting very physical So watch your step cause if you do I'll need a miracle  
  
Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, Joey, and Rachel all sat there in the living room with perplexed looks. So many wild thoughts ran through their heads. Could it be true? Was it a hoax? Did he really love her? Was Ross just pulling their leg?  
  
"Wow. Didn't see that coming!" Joey said with a smile.  
  
Rachel hadn't moved since Ross said those very words. "It's you Rachel. You're the girl I've had a crush on for the longest time." Those words echoed through her heart.  
  
"Rach, say something." Ross pleaded. She sat there, stunned. "Please? Say something." Five minutes passed without her saying a word. "I gotta get some air." He escaped to the balcony outside on the terrace.  
  
When he was gone, Monica took a shot at saying something. "Rach, are you okay?"  
  
She finally broke her silence and said, "Yeah. I'm fine. I just...I just need to be alone for a second. I'm gonna go to my room."  
  
As he sat outside on the cold terrace, Ross saw Rachel walk into her room. With that, he began to cry. He turned away so no one could see him. He didn't want it to be true. Did she love him like he loved her? Had he just made a complete ass of himself?  
  
You drain me dry and make me wonder why I'm here This Double vision I was seeing is finally clear You want to stay but you know very well I want you gone. Not fit to funkin' tread the ground I'm walking on  
  
Rachel was flopped on her bed, with her head in her pillow. She softly began to cry. This was what she wanted. He was the guy she was destined to be with. He was her Prince Charming. Yet, she was petrified. Did he truly forgive her for all her jealous acts? Did he truly love her? She really hoped he had quit playing games with her heart. She realized that if she didn't take this chance, she could lose everything she's ever wanted. With that, she lifted herself off the bed, wiped away her tears, and walked back into the living room.  
  
Monica was the first to notice her. It appeared as if she had been crying from her red eyes. "Rach, are you okay?"  
  
Sniffling back any emotions, she said, "Yeah. I'm fine."  
  
Joey looked at his friend and said, "Don't do anything I wouldn't do." Chandler and Monica glared at him. "Sorry Rach."  
  
Rach laughed. "No, it's okay Joe. Thanks you guys. If you excuse me, I have someone to see."  
  
She walked over to the window. She opened it. As Ross heard it open, he sighed as in he knew his sister was probably coming out to talk to him. Probably to ask him what he was thinking.Yet, he heard Rachel's voice and was utterly happy like a child in a candy store.  
  
"Ross?" Rachel said very innocently. He turned around. To see her there, it melted his heart. He was blissful.  
  
"Yeah, Rach?" he questioned.  
  
"Look, I was taken by shock with your announcement. I didn't expect you to tell me this. I didn't know this was the way you felt. I didn't know what to think. But I'm glad you decided to share this with me."  
  
He got up and walked over to her, placing his arms around her shoulders. "You are?"  
  
"Yes. Words can not define what I'm feeling right now, Ross. Give me a dictionary and I'd be here forever trying to describe my feelings. To tell the truth, I've felt the same way for a long time. I just didn't have the guts to admit it to you."  
  
"But why? Rach, you know you can always tell me anything. Anything."  
  
"Because of the past. Because of our past relationship. Because of every time I've been jealous of another girl having you. I felt you hated me."  
  
"Rach, I could never hate you. You know that. You're one of the most dearest people in the world to be. I don't know what I'd do if you weren't a part of my life."  
  
"With feeling like that, I didn't want to say anything. I didn't want to make a fool of myself. I didn't want to have my heart beaten to smithereens."  
  
"Rach, It's okay. I...I didn't say anything either because I didn't want to make a fool of myself."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Really. You're more than I could ever ask for. You're a friend, you're a confidant, you're someone special. The way you laugh, the way you cry, the way you are there for someone. There are just so many things I love about you. Your smile makes me weak in the knees. And your beauty puts butterflies in my stomach. Rach, the past is the past. But now, what we have is the future. Anything's possible if your heart believes in it. Let's make things right."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yes. I want to give it another shot. I think we've both learned from our past and mistakes. I bet we both dont want to make them again. I know I certainly don't. We have a New Year coming upon us. The world is our oyster. Let's start fresh. What do you say? Will you be my girlfriend again, please?"  
  
Just the puppy dog look in his eyes made her weak. How could you not love this man, she felt her heart telling her. She thought if she didn't take this chance now, it might never happen again and she could regret this for eternity.  
  
With one long breath, she was ready to reveal her answer to him.  
  
"Yes. Yes Ross I will!"  
  
And with that, she drew his body in close to hers. She grabbed him and started to passionately kiss him. The smoothness of his lips upon hers was magical. Orgasmic she might say. This is how it was suppose to be. 


	2. Chapter 2

Harder to Breathe - Chapter 2 -  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own these characters. Nor the song "Harder to Breathe" by Maroon 5 which inspired this fic.  
  
Monica watched closely as Ross and Rachel embraced. At that moment, her heart skipped a beat. This is something she had wished for a long time, like the two of them. Ross and Rachel. It just sounded so pure, so natural. They were destined for each other. Monica knew from the moment her dorky older brother laid eyes on Rachel all those years back that some day they'd all be gathered at their wedding. She just realized it was about to come true. As she continued to watch them hug, she felt grateful. She had a husband, Chandler, who loved her unbelievably. With that, she walked over to Chandler in the kitchen, wrapped her arms around him, and planted a kiss on his sweet little head.  
  
"Mmm. That was nice. What was that for?" Chandler asked.  
  
"Everything. Thank you for marrying me and loving me. I couldn't picture it any other way," she said with a smile.  
  
Chandler looked at her and kissed her forehead. "I love you too, Baby Cakes. So, what's happening with Ross and Rachel?"  
  
Meanwhile, Ross and Rachel continued to snuggle in each other's arms on the balcony. As his grip around her stood firm, Rachel was in heaven. This is what it felt like with Ross's arms around her, heaven. She felt safe. She felt secure. Nothing could tear her apart from this moment. But as she stood there, with Ross's arms around her, she pondered their past. Could they really get over the jealousy? Could they accept the things the other did? Would they be able to wipe those fears they had away?  
  
How dare you say that my behavior is unacceptable  
  
So condescending unnecessarily critical  
  
I have the tendency of getting very physical  
  
So watch your step cause if I do you'll need a miracle  
  
You drain me dry and make me wonder why I'm even here  
  
This Double Vision I was seeing is finally clear  
  
You want to stay but you know very well I want you gone  
  
Not fit to funkin' tread the ground I'm walking on  
  
She broke away from Ross's embrace. "Ross?" she spoke with a quivering voice.  
  
"What?"  
  
"You really think it's possible for us to get through the past?"  
  
"Of course I do. Why? What's wrong?"  
  
"Nothing," she said. She was trying to hold back any tears. "Ross, I'm just afraid." And with that, a waterfall began to flow.  
  
"Rach, what are you so afraid of? You know you can tell me anything."  
  
"I'm just.I'm just.I'm just afraid that the past is going to repeat itself. I'm afraid someone is going to come along and take you away from me. Someone's going to ride in on a White Horse and save you from a disastrous relationship with me. You don't know how bad I want this Ross. For the past couple of months I've prayed night and day we'd be together by some magical force. My heart has yearned for you all these past months. It was like a piece of me had been ripped out from the inside and I could never have it back. I just want security, you know? I want to know that we're both committed to making this work. Please tell me you are. Because I don't think I can stand to get my heart broken again." She wiped away the tears. There, she said it. Those feelings she had bottled up inside her.  
  
Baffled by what she just said, Ross took a deep breath.  
  
"Rachel, I know I've said it a thousand times and I'll say it again. I love you, with all my heart and more. I know you're afraid of getting hurt; yet, so am I. I know you're afraid of losing me; yet, so am I. I can't tell you how much I want this to work. I think we can make it work. Don't you? We've both been in terrible relationships in the past. We've learned from those mistakes and we've learned from the mistakes in our past relationship. I honestly promise I won't disappoint. I'm here for you, forever."  
  
It just seemed then that all of her fears were calmed. It was as if God had descended from heaven and purified their souls, rid of any jealousy or hatred. She knew this was going to be it. She knew this was going to be her future, her husband, her soul mate, her eternity.  
  
When it gets cold outside and you got nobody to love  
  
You'll understand what I mean when I say  
  
There's no way we're gonna give up  
  
And like a little girl cries in the face of a monster that lives in her dreams  
  
Is there anyone out there cause it's getting harder and harder to breathe  
  
Is there anyone out there cause it's getting harder and harder to breathe  
  
What you are doing is screwing things up inside my head  
  
You should know better you never listened to a word I said  
  
Clutching your pillow and writhing in a naked sweat  
  
Hoping somebody someday will do you like I did  
  
"Let's go in," she said as she shivered. "It's cold as hell out here." She reached for his hand, put hers in it. With their fingers locking together, she turned and kissed him.  
  
As they were proceeding to go back into Monica & Chandler's, Joey yelled out, "Hey guys! Get in here! You're missing all the festivities." They had to laugh, for Joey was dancing around with a "Happy New Year's!" crown and Phoebe was tossing him M&M's to see if he could catch them in his mouth. 


	3. Chapter 3

bHarder to Breathe - Chapter 3/b  
  
bDisclaimer:/b I don't own these characters. But hey, if I did I could have a lot of fun!! And I'm not sure how long this is going to be. Depending upon if I want it to be short or if I want it to be long. Nevertheless, I will tell you that'll you'll be satisfied.  
  
The happy couple finally walked in off the balcony. Monica, Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe were all sitting in the living room, stuffing their faces with Monica's black and white cookies while playing a splendid game of Scence-It i(author anecdote: If you've never played this game before, it's really fun! It's a board game for your TV as it's on a DVD. You gotta get what movie it is, actor, piece pictures together to make a title, etc.) /i  
  
Phoebe was entranced, trying to decipher what the heck that picture was. "All I see are lousy dots! All I see are dots!!" She looked over to see Ross and Rachel quietly laughing to themselves. "Oh, hey two you. Hey you lovebirds."  
  
Joey gazed up as well. "Oh! Hey guys. So, are you back together? For good?"  
  
Rachel look at Ross and she nodded. "Yes, we are." Ross leaned in for another one of her kisses. He loved the way her sweet, angelic lips felt against his. It was paradise.  
  
Chandler was so thrilled for his best friend. He's known Ross forever it feels like, when in reality it's just been since college. But it's like he's known him since he was in kindergarten and asked him to share his crayons. When he met Ross's family, he felt some normalcy. When Ross began to date Rachel, he felt utter joy for his friend. When he broke up with Rachel, he felt a part of him had been broken too, like Ross's heart had. Ross has been for him all these years, including the ones were he went out with his sister Monica. He never thought he'd find his soul mate, especially in his best friend's little sister. But now that he has, he's glad Ross has Rachel and will be happy.  
  
"That's so great, man. Congrats." He got up and walked over to the happy reunited couple. He gave Rach a quick peck on the cheek and a quick embrace with Ross. "Beer?" Chandler inquired to Ross. "Sure. Heinken if you've got one." "Only those for they are the best."  
  
While all three of the guys walked over to the fridge to get some drinks, Rachel walked over to Phoebe and Monica who were sitting on the couch. She flopped down in the big comfortable chair as she had done many of times, with a happy relieved sigh.  
  
"Happy?" Phoebe asked Rachel. Rachel nodded her head. "Good. I'm glad. You deserve it. So, what did he ask you on the patio? Did he ask you to marry him?"  
  
"Phoebe!" Monica yelped. "God, he just told her how he felt. It's not like he'd ask her to marry him that fast. Is it?"  
  
Phoebe giggled. "This is Ross we're talking about here. You know, Mr.Divorco. Mr.I'm-Divorced-Of-Manhattan-Club-President. The guy who likes to shortly date a girl, pop the question.."  
  
"Alright Phoebe! Enough! I can see where you're going with this. That's not what happened," Rachel said calmly.  
  
"Then what did?"  
  
She sighed and took a deep breath. With a glance over at the guys in the kitchen to make sure they weren't looking over into the living, she turned back to Monica and Phoebe and divulged the juicy info.  
  
"Well, he basically poured his heart out to me. He told me that there are so many things he loves about. He said I make him go weak in the knees, put a butterfly in his stomach. He basically told me how he felt. Then he asked me what I thought and how I felt."  
  
"And what did you tell him," Phoebe pried out of her.  
  
"I was scared at first..you know. There's all this history between us. I'm scared I'm gonna get hurt again. I'm scared I might hurt him again. But, I told him how I felt, laying it out there on the line. He told me not to worry.for he felt the same way. He wants to make this work. From the look in his eyes, I knew it was true. Because, boy do I want this to work to. You guys have no idea. And we just talked and figured this out and..I.I really think this time we're going to last. I can feel it."  
  
Monica was ecstatic for her best friend. She knew that Ross was Rachel's Prince Charming. It was as if the shoe fit and they were a perfect match. She had a gut feeling deep down that these two "idiots" in love were going to end up. And what a perfect way, she thought, to start off the New Year.  
  
"Rach, I couldn't be happier for you. You're smile is so big now.any other reason why?" she asked.  
  
Rachel simply sighed and looked over at Ross in the kitchen. Chandler, Joey, and Ross were all making their way over to the living room now. Ross sat on the arm of the chair where she was and slipped his arms around her neck. She was in heaven.  
  
"Nope. Except I don't think I could be truly happier at this moment," she said as she turned to lip lock with Ross. A sweet, blissful kiss. Then she turned back. "I'm truly happy. You have no idea."  
  
iWhen it gets cold outside and you got nobody to love You'll understand what I mean when I say There's no way we're gonna give up. And like a little girl cries in the face of a monster that lives in her dreams Is there anyone out there cause it's getting harder and harder to breathe Is there anyone out there cause it's getting harder and harder to breathe/i 


	4. Chapter 4

**Harder to Breathe – Chapter 4**

**Disclaimer:** I do not own these characters, though it'd be fun if I did! ;)

The six sat in Monica & Chandler's living room as they usually had every New Years Ever for as long as they could remember. It was tradition and they all knew how much this meant to be with each other on New Years Eve. As they sat watching the festivities of the New Years Eve celebration in Times Square, it was in Monica's mind that this was one of the most picturesque moments there had been in the past few months. She sat nestled in Chandler's arms. Ross and Rachel were snuggling together in the big chair, gentling caressing each other's faces with their fingers. Phoebe and Joey were without someone special but that didn't matter to them. They were having a ball of fun watching the festivities. And in the midst of Monica's tranquil thoughts, Joey burst out screeching.

"Hey, no one else finished their resolutions."

Monica realized he was right. Since she had asked Ross first, she had just stopped there because everyone had been eagerly intrigued by Ross's resolution. She decided she'd reveal hers next. "Okay, my New Year's Resolution is to not be so bossy."

Everyone starred at her. Chandler sarcastically laughed at his wife. This was her resolution every year. And every year she failed in trying to accomplish this within the first month of the New Year. 

"What? Why are you all looking at me like I have six heads?" She couldn't stand it when they did that.

"It's just that…um…Mon, you've had that every year as your resolution," Ross said. "And every year, you don't go through with it."

"Yes I do!" she screeched.

Chandler shook his head and said, "No you don't. You promised me last New Years Eve you wouldn't be so bossy about how I leave the bathroom after I use it and take a shower. Within a month of the New Year, you were flipping out and telling me which way to hang the towel, which towel set was to go into the bathroom that week, complaining that I never refill the soap dispenser. Or that I don't put down the toilet seat."

"Well, how hard is it to remember to put down the toilet seat after you've used the bathroom?! Honestly, every time you forget and I fall in, I fell like I'm using a bidet in a hotel in Spain." 

Phoebe laughed. She could just imagine Monica doing that.

Chandler smiled at Monica. He knew all those things were true. Sometimes he just did it to drive her crazy. Other times, he just frankly forgot. "Sweetie, you could be a little nicer about it sometimes."

Monica thought about it. "Okay, this year I will stop being bossy. AND I will PROVE you guys wrong and be able to keep this resolution. Enough of me. Chandler, yours would be?"

"I plan on planning more romantic getaways for my wife and I to enjoy in the most romantic spots I can think of. Maybe I'll surprise you when I least expect it."

She smiled. She loved when Chandler was such a romantic.

Joey spoke up. "My resolution is to find myself someone who I can have a long term relationship with."

"Aww Joey, that's so sweet," Phoebe replied. "Mine is to play my guitar more and get more massage clients."

During the whole time everyone was telling their resolutions, Rachel continued to caress Ross's face. She loved his face. It was the face of her Prince Charming. She simply couldn't get enough. All she could think was she could eat him up in his adorableness. She was so entranced that she didn't hear Phoebe calling her name.

"Rach. Rach." Still no answer. "RACHEL KAREN GREEN!"

A little taken aback by the volume articulated in Phoebe's voice, Rachel twitched. "I'm sorry, Pheebs. What'd you ask me?"

"I said, what's your resolution?"

"Oh. Well, that's simple enough. My resolution….is to not screw up this current relationship I've got going." 

"I like that one!" Ross exclaimed.

Joey was beginning to get impatient to see the ball drop. He always enjoyed watching the ball drop on New Year's. It was tradition. "Does anyone know what time this stupid ball is going to drop?! I'm too excited I don't think I can wait anymore."

Monica glanced at Joey, who had a look on his face that perceived him to look as ecstatic as a monkey does when someone gives them a banana. She looked at her wrist at the brand new watch Chandler had given her for Christmas. "It's 11:58. We better all pay attention to the TV."

The gang all turned to the celebration they had been watching on TV. As the announcer on the TV began to do the countdown, Joey and Phoebe chimed in. 

"Ten….nine….eight….seven….six….five…four…three…two…one! Happy New Year!" they both yelled. They genuinely kissed each other on the cheeks and blew their party horns. Chandler and Monica kissed passionately. Ross and Rachel were still stuffed in the little chair, blissfully kissing. After a while, they broke away. They looked around as Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, and Joey were all in the kitchen drinking champagne and having a little toast.

"Rach, I truly, madly, deeply, love you," as he intimately pecked her cheek with a kiss. "I'm so glad you believed in your heart that we could work things out and give this relationship a try again. It means the world to me, as do you."

Quietly wiping away any tears that began to slip from hey eyelids from those sweet words from Ross, Rachel shook her head in agreement. "I couldn't agree more. I love you. It just feels so good to say this to your face without a cringe after all these months. But, as of this moment, I don't think I'd want to be starting a relationship with anyone but you."

 _When it gets cold outside and you got nobody to love  
You'll understand what I mean when I say  
There's no way we're gonna give up  
And like a little girl cries in the face of a monster that lives in her dreams  
Is there anyone out there cause it's getting harder and harder to breathe  
Is there anyone out there cause it's getting harder and harder to breathe_

Smiling, Ross began to get up from the chair. Once he was up, he pulled her up from the chair. "Come on, let's go get some champagne with the rest of them"

The lovebirds walked over to the kitchen. Each was given a glass of champagne by Monica. The six put their glasses together for a toast.

"To the New Year and many great things to come," Chandler professed.

"To the New Year!" Everyone's glasses clinked together and they all sipped. Ross and Rachel decided to have their own little toast to each other. Slinking back a few steps from the other four, they put their glasses together. 

"To us. May this relationship last a lifetime," they both said in unison. Their glasses clinked and they kissed. The New Year was beginning to look very promising. 


End file.
